Halloween 2013

Another Halloween is in the books. It was a little different than expected because my brother contracted pink eye, leaving us cousin-less, but it was still a really fun Halloween. Since it was chilly and drizzly, Asher and I joined Isaac, Audrey, Elliot, and Jim on our street, then headed home to hand out candy and fill him up on his favorite Halloween treat-milk.

The miracle of the day is that we purchased our costumes at Goodwill last November and we found them in time for Halloween and all the kids still liked them. See, miracle was not an exaggeration. Since we didn't know about the Asher boy last November the kids picked out a skeleton costume for him in keeping with our spooky theme.

Without further ado, I present to you our vampire, witch, bat, and skeleton!

uno, dos, tres, y cuatro pumpkins. AKA three spookies and a baby

chubby skeleton. Can you be both?

Boo!

sweet and spooky

trick-or-treaters behind the smoke machine-spooky!

Trick-or-treat!

The cutest little bat with dimples

cutest little spooky witch on the block

Our really scary vampire-it was his first year to look scary

The gang's all here. I love this picture!

surveying the loot and choosing the first treat

she tossed out all the nerds and smarties-smart witch

done sucking blood for the night, he's ready for candy

CANDY!!!!

Happy Halloween.

rain on the sleep parade, etc.

nothing will put a damper on the beginnings of the baby learning to sleep a little longer in his bunny bassinet than the baby's first cold. the wheezing and the coughing and the little sniffles are so very sad and require that the mama sit upright whilst the baby sleeps. sad, indeed, on many levels.

but can we talk about the difference between first and fourth kids? Isaac didn't get his first cold until he was about 10 months old and I called a doctor to see if he needed to go in because I thought he might need medical attention due to the wheezing. the doctor was able to diagnose it as a cold over the phone to save me the embarrassment of being that first time mom who brings her baby in because he has a cold. Asher's just 10 weeks old and has his first cold thanks to older siblings who go to co-op, gather germs, and share them with the little brother in the form of hugs, kisses, and big cuddles. I'm not concerned that Asher will die from his cold and I haven't even considered calling the doctor or taking him in. That's called progress.

We shall celebrate Halloween tonight with costumes and cousins and neighbors and chocolate. And fog and the possibility of cold drizzle, too. Big boo to that. The kids made a solid bid for no school on account of the holiday, but I countered with an all-Halloween curriculum instead to which they heartily agreed. It has been a fun morning of oozing experiments and scary stories and spooky math word problems. Then we'll get all dolled up for Halloween, gobsmacked by the fact that we are once again celebrating a first Halloween with our little guy. Isaac, Audrey, and Elliot keep telling him he can't have the candy. He'll be okay with that this year, but next year he'll be running after them in a futile attempt to keep up with them on the trick-or-treating paths. But for this year we'll shove him into his little skeleton costume and make a trick-or-treating appearance before he and I head home to hand out treats while the rest of the gang hits the street for more treats.

Someday I will. . .

Someday I will sleep for more than three hours in a row.

Someday I will wear a real outfit for an entire day and it will not have spit up on it. Not even a drop.

Someday I will wear my hair in something other than a ponytail.

Someday I will have a home with a mud room. And I will sing a song of rejoicing. Seriously, I sing about things like that.

Someday I will look out to a big backyard full of mature trees and kids playing ball, preferably with a mountain in the background.

Someday I will spend my days caring for and advocating for children who have known too much hate and fear.

Someday I will add more stamps to my passport in the form of mission trips.

Someday I will write a book. Major bonus if others actually pay to read it.

Someday I will run a marathon. Major bonus if Shaun and Kristen are running next to me. Or at least waiting at the finish line.

Someday I will tool around the country in a big ol' suburban pulling a camper, taking in the sights and history of the land with my family.

Someday I will look back on this life and sigh the contented sigh of a woman who made a whole slew of mistakes, but was always right where she belonged, erred on the side of love, and did what she could to make her little corner of the world a better place.

hours



As in, not enough of them. It's not that I'm exactly busy because we purposely keep our schedule fairly open so my head doesn't explode. It's not like I'm running around a lot right now, it's just that there's so much going on right here. School, feeding people, laundry, diapers, holding baby, caring for bigger kids, the occasional shower, an attempt at fitness. I look back at the end of the day and wonder what the heck just happened. We are definitely getting into a bit of a routine, but I feel like I'm in a constant state of what did I forget or miss today. And I really don't like that.

Part of it is the lack of consistent sleep and the fact that Asher spends the last few hours of the night sleeping on me. This takes away my most productive time of the day because I am the first one up in the house so I can straighten up, work out, get breakfast ready, and generally get my head ready for the day. Now I can't get up until Asher wakes up and it's really cramping the start to my day. I know it'll change so quickly, but right now it makes my days a little rough. I am a morning person so by the time we get all the kids to bed I am beat. Aaah, the life with young kids. I don't dare wish these fleeting moments with a new baby away,  but I also just need a little sleep.

Thankfully I have moments like these that make up for the disarray of my life and the sleep deprivation.

he loves tummy time

calm, beautiful boy



Adorable hat from Kendra

sister snuggles

pre-Halloween fun

Best smile picture yet!

baby cuddles are the best

mama and Cheeks

happy halloween

ooey gooey pumpkin fun

slimed

finally got Elliot to touch the stuff so we took a silly picture

goofy pumpkin carvers


because this must be commemorated

Right now, as I type, Asher boy is taking a nap in his bunny bassinet. He fell asleep without being held. I helped him by having my finger in the pacifier hole and gently rocking the bassinet. He slept for a few minutes, then woke up. I went up, put the paci back in his mouth, rocked him until he fell asleep, and walked out again. This is huge. Epic, I dare say.

Today

Today I sat at my spot on our big ol' desk for four, Asher in my arms, going over a writing lesson. My nose happened to brush upon Asher's forehead, skin so soft it reminded me of the translucent wings of a butterfly. I breathed him in. Milk and newness and a hint of fresh baby still lingering in his soft, thin hair. Oh, it was a little moment of heaven in my day.

the life and times of asher-2 months

14.8 pounds (95%)

24 inches (85%)

16 1/4 head circumference (97%)



you're sleeping in my arms. I hear your little breaths and feel your chest rise and fall and I stop what i'm doing and watch. just watch. because a person could miss this. the importance of it. the wonder and miracle of it.

this stuff you're doing is big and important, this growing business. you stay awake longer during the day. you smile. you coo. (oh, how we adore the coo.) you are this close to finding your laugh. you engage with us in sweet ways. you find your fist and stick it in your mouth. you are beginning to stretch out your feedings and sleep a bit longer at night. you are changing right before our very eyes and it is nothing short of a miracle, the way your mind and body formed in such sweet and perfect harmony to create you, just you. and I don't want to forget or miss it in the midst of all of this.

in the midst of this sleeplessness and lack of groceries and schooling and attempts at housekeeping, serious growing and developing is going on, but it happens so quietly and stealthily that I could miss it if I wasn't paying close attention. And I really don't want to miss it. This gift I've been given to watch a life unfold and see the world through the awestruck eyes of a baby, where everything is new and full of delight and awesome in the true and majestic sense of the word. I get to do all of that again. I still can't really believe it.

NICKNAMES: Squishy, Asher Boy, sweet cheeks, super baby, shelf, Buddha baby

 

LIKES: Mama. Being held. Breast milk. Mornings. moby wrap. tummy time. lights. mirrors. swing-sometimes

DISLIKES: sleeping flat on his back.

EATING: yes, please. often and a lot of it. hence he was up from 8 lbs 2 oz to 10 lbs 9.5 oz in less than 4 weeks and now weighs in at 14 lbs 8 oz.. He eats every two to three hours during the day, then has a few stretches of 3-4 hours between feedings at night.

SLEEPING: it's a work in progress, but the last two nights have been the best, so here's hoping. he's sleeping more in his own bassinet, so that's a huge help.

PLAYING: He likes to look at himself in the mirror. still doesn't play, but very busy watching the world. his siblings are always eager to entertain him. Watching those four together is just the sweetest.

MILESTONES: Cooing, almost laughing, becoming a calm and happy baby! His head is getting stronger, but he likes tummy time too much to actually lift up with his arms. This has been a huge month for Asher boy. 

enjoy the ride

Today we went on our longest excursion since having Asher boy and it went as well as it could have gone. Library for school books and books for our reading pleasure, Auto Zone for something for the hitch that will enable us to pull the future camper, Target for a bunch of school stuff, not to mention the clothes that I randomly pulled off of the racks as we walked past the women's section to get to the checkout. Jim just laughed as I grabbed a sweater, one long sleeved V-neck, and two fitted tanks to go under the sweater and had Audrey bring them to the cart that was already being unloaded on the conveyer belt. "That's how most women shop," was his actual comment. He should know by now: I'm not most women.

I bought a journal at Target and the title has a bicycle stitched in different colors with the words, "Enjoy the ride" under it. There are times it is so easy to enjoy the ride. Tonight was one of those times. We had a relaxing dinner where we discussed what the kids might want to be when they grow up. I try to ask the kids at least one open-ended question each night because if I didn't we'd rehash the sports page each and every night and that gets a little old for me and leaves Audrey mostly silent. I asked Audrey first and she said, "I'm not sure if I've told you this before, but I'm thinking I might want to be someone who cuts people's hair." She hadn't told me that and has said that she wants to be a dance teacher for as long as I can remember. I loved learning that about her. Isaac said, "Well, it's pretty obvious what I'll be." I assumed he's say football, basketball, or baseball player, but I just said that I wasn't sure. "A rapper," he said matter of factly. I wouldn't categorize that as obvious, but ok. Elliot went with football player since it is football season so it's his favorite sport right now.

After that conversation, I regaled the children with stories of Balderdash games. They asked if we could buy the game and then asked about our wedding day. The kids, particularly Audrey, have wanted to hear all kinds of stories from when I was a kid. When I mention that I remembered a new story her face lights up and her eyes shine brightly. It is just adorable. Makes me wish I remembered more of my youth. Anyway, we talked about our wedding day. Isaac said, "It probably involved lots of kissing." We agreed that there was some kissing and then proceeded to do some kissing in the kitchen because it's good for them to see us being affectionate with each other. Then we told them about the dance, including some gentle ribbing of Jim due to his absolute hatred of dancing. They wondered if he danced so we played "wonderful tonight" by Eric Clapton and relived our first dance. Then we played more of our favorite songs and ended up with our second song and first dance song again, but this time I danced with all of the kids. First, I danced with Isaac and showed him where to put his hands and how to turn me. And I thought ahead to when he'd dance slowly with someone who wasn't his mama and I started to get sad, but then I decided to just stay here in the moment and be really happy. Because golly, that was a happy moment. Then Audrey and I danced and she spun and wanted to barrel roll with me, but my arms were too tight from today's workout so I had to take a raincheck. Then it was Elliot's turn and that little sweetie petey is so ticklish that he wiggled a little when I draped my arm over his shoulder. He swayed back and forth with me and I spun him because I couldn't fit under his little 5-year-old arms.

Then bedtime for Elliot, a long and lovely chat with Audrey while we laid in her bed and she stroked my hair, The Jungle Book with Isaac, snuggles with Asher. Yes, it's very easy to enjoy the ride in times like these.

This is in stark contrast to this morning when Jim and I realized that our kids have lived 9, 7, and 5 years of their lives and somehow never gained a working understanding of the term, "Clean up the living room floor." Oh my stars, how is this so difficult? It was painful, like pulling teeth if the teeth belong to a starving wild boar. I modeled, I helped, I explained, I participated, and I lost my cool, too. It was the lowlight of a really good day. I was most certainly not enjoying the ride.

Parenting is full of intense highs and abysmal lows and sometimes they happen in the very same day. Treasured stories and dancing in the living, tantrums and tempers lost. But they're all part of the ride. It reminds me of what I tell the kids. You can't control what other people do; you can only control how you react to it. There will be frustrations. It's not easy going from helpless newborn, a la Asher boy, to toddler to kid, a la Audrey and Elliot, to young man, a la Isaac, to pre-teen and teen and grown-up. Mistakes will be made and hopefully learned from. It's all part of the ride and even though it isn't always easy and isn't always pretty, I am so happy to be riding with my husband and our four kids on wacky and wild ride. Just in case you ever wonder.

celebrating the fact that it's Halloween in 2 weeks with costume day

chilling

fall fun





Nana was here for a visit last weekend and we decided to visit the pumpkin patch. It was certainly chilly, but also very fun. It was a wonderful weekend with nana, Cory, Maclain, Beckett, and even a visit from Trudi. When we were talking about Trudi visiting, Audrey asked how we were related and I said that she wasn't actually related, but she'd known nana so long that she was like our family. She felt really lucky to have an extra family member and we talked about the people in our lives who aren't actually related, but are family nonetheless. I'm so happy to know our kids are surrounded by so many people who love them. Between pumpkin patches, family dinners, backyard football, and cousin fun, it was a fantastic weekend.

clearly enjoying feeding the goats

 

hanging out with nana and the bull

brrrrr. chilly day at the pumpkin patch. don't they just look miserable?

Isaac's 19 pound pumpkin and Audrey's beautiful smile

Audrey's 13 pound pumpkin

cuties trying to stay warm

the ride back from the pumpkin patch. Asher was the warmest person in the joint

Trudi brought facial hair for the kids. I can only say EWWWWW.

Isaac was totally in weird, serious character the entire time he had the stache on